I got off work early this afternoon which leaves me more time to pack. You see, I'm going home this weekend. For myself, this is no small event. I've only been home once since coming to school at that was for less than 24 hours after my brother's wedding. I'm driving up to the cities tonight to stay with a friend and then both she and I will be going to my house tomorrow. My church has a candidate for pastor there this weekend so he will be speaking tomorrow in addition to Sunday so we hope to make it in time to hear him speak in the morning. It's a huge relief to not have to make the drive all by myself. This morning I wondered how I would make it through the day. I only had two classes, but I had to take a test that I had rescheduled and I had a quiz. I passed the quiz, but the test I'm not so sure about. It's not that I didn't study, in fact I studied very hard. But it's a class that both tests I've gotten so confused when I go to answer the questions that I just dreaw a blank. It's funny how when you get tired that you start being satisfied with lower grades.
Actually that's not true, I get even more frustrated, but I don't know what to do about it. I can only push myself so far and I seem to be less productive when pushed that far. Ahh well, it'll slow down for a week now before it picks up again. A week of reprieve before the next onslaught as it were. Along with that is this weekend of refuge. I'll be with lots of people at the church, but other than that I have no plans but to spend time with my family and hug my mom a lot. My brother and his wife will be coming home as well with my nephew Alex. Considering how much Alex loves to talk that will make the weekend even more fun. I might not get lots of physical rest, but I plan on resting my soul a whole lot. My spirit needs some refreshing and a break.
So there is 30 minutes until dinner and I think I'll take this opportunity to either go pack or read a book that isn't required...hmm but then there's the chance to get ahead on homework...ahh the choices of life.
Your prayers would be appreciated for my home church as this weekend occurs with the candidate. My prayer is for a pastor. I don't know this man and his family at all and I know nothing about them. But I pray that God will bring a shephard to our church to do just that, shephard. So please pray for guidance and for provision.
I look forward to my short drive into the cities. It's not so far tonight and it'll be good to have some time just to be. Be what I'm not sure. I'll have time to think, pray, and process the last few weeks. There are some relationships I need to work through and some issues in my heart. God never ceases to amaze me with His overwhelming prescence. When I feel so dry and empty that I can't even ask to be filled, He causeth my cup to overfloweth. Maybe not visibly with physical blessings, but the cup in my heart overfloweth with the knowledge that He restoreth my soul.
Last night in our floor meeting Ms. Roiger (she runs the bookstore on campus) came to share with us. She's a wonderful lady and radiates the love of God to everyone. Her sister is a freshman here and we're getting to be friends. Anyway, Ms. Roiger shared about the passage in Mark 4 where Jesus calms the storm. She mentioned how since we know the end of the story we often miss the details in the middle. Like the disciples panicking for instance. They weren't just gently waking Jesus up trying to get His attention, they were doing some serious panicking. After He calms the storm we all know how they remark that even the wind and waves obey Him. Yet it's so easy to miss the importance of this little verse: "But He said to them, "Why are you so fearful? How is it that you have no faith?" When the storms of life are crashing all around us why is it that we're so fearful? We can have faith in our Father. We ended our floor meeting last night by sinking "It Is Well". Listening to over 30 girls sing of the peace of God reminded me how fearful I've been lately.
And so I leave for the weekend asking God to calm my heart and replace my fear with faith. May you find His peace as well.
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