We have a personal stake in this day. As most of you know, Levi was born at 33 weeks, 6 days. He was so tiny at 4 pounds 10 ounces and 17 3/4 inches long! But he was sturdy. He never really bore that look of a preemie. He was just miniature.
He cried immediately and we had time for Andy to hold him, me to kiss him, and to get one quick family photo. Then he was whisked away to the NICU. Andrew went with him and took lots of pictures for me to see later. They weighed him, got him hooked up to monitors, got the footprints, and did lots of tests. His blood sugar was pretty low so he had to have an IV for a few days (in his foot, his arm veins just weren't big enough). He also had a feeding tube put in as he was too little and weak to be able to eat correctly. I got to hold him for the first time about 2 hours after he was born. He was so tiny but so perfect. I loved him immediately. It was torture to have to go back to my room and rest. I didn't get much sleep after his birth. Every time I woke up I wanted to go see him. Andy and I went later that night and got to see him get all cleaned up and learned a little more about his care. I was so out of it as I was in so much pain, but I remember him getting his hair washed and just rubbing his silky head. He definitely looked like his Daddy. But he has my nose, poor baby!
The following days are so clear and so fuzzy. I will say this, the day I was released from the hospital without my baby was one of the worst days of my life. Unless you've experienced it, it's hard to describe. But I firmly believe God has given every Momma that instinct, that gift, to nurture their baby. And when you have to leave him in the hospital, it's torture. We didn't realize then how fast that time would go, or how small it would be in the grand scheme of things. But each day was so long and hard at the time. We just didn't know when he would get to go home. It was hard to even fathom that. I remember a nurse saying we might be gone by New Year's, and being in shock because that was unthinkable at the time. Christmas Day was sad and lonely but wonderful too. Levi had the lid of his "giraffe" raised that day. A giraffe is what they called the isolette's. Because the lid could be raised up on a long neck like a giraffe. That was a big deal because it meant he was regulating his own temperature. That was one step to get to come home. If someone had told me we'd come home less than 2 weeks later, I wouldn't have believed them.
But we did get to come home, on January 4th, 2010. 18 days after Levi was born, we finally got sole care of him. And really, those first 18 days, you don't feel like the parent. Oh, you love your baby and care for them, but you're not the main caregiver, and that's hard. But without the NICU, the nurses, the neonatologists, and especially, the March of Dimes support program, it would have been a nightmare.
I know many people have issues and strong beliefs about the March of Dimes and some aspects of their program. But I need to tell you this, without their support program at St. Cloud Hospital (The only program in Minnesota!!) I would have been so desperately alone during that time. Andrew couldn't be there every day, he had to go back to work. I was an hour from home, trying to recover myself, and trying to learn to be a Momma and get my baby home, and I was alone. That support program provided activities, food, and the opportunity to make friends in the NICU with other parents and to share our sorrow and experiences. We even could laugh together.
So, I ask you to not only support the March of Dimes, but to realize that every baby is a miracle, and thanks to our gifts of modern medicine and programs, more and more babies are living. 100 years ago I doubt that Levi or I would have lived. But we did by God's grace and mercy. And by his gift of modern technology.
So today I'm thankful for the March of Dimes, and I'm thankful to ask you to help raise the awareness of prematurity and do all we can to stop it. So that no other parents have to go through what we did.
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