Today at work a co-worker who "happens" to be a Christian said a simple but yet profound statement to me. She said "If we were perfect, we wouldn't need Jesus." I literally stopped what I was doing and just looked at her. "You're right I said, and I'd better remember that". How easily I beat myself up over repeating the same mistakes over and over again, when instead, I should repent and thank God for Jesus and salvation and the chance to again realize how much I need Him. Yes I'm supposed to become more Christ-like everyday, but Christ Himself said we need Him and need to remember our salvation always. So I've decided I don't want to be perfect, I just want to need Jesus more everyday. My incompetence is a cry to Him to be everything for and to me. I think that's something getting married has taught me. Never before have I seen all my imperfections in light of Christ's love. When my husband sees my outright sin and selfishness and loves and forgives me, I'm given a small taste of what it's like to be Christ's child.
Mr. Hudson told us in pre-marital counseling that we need to be a picture of God the Father and God the Son to the world. A picture of leadership and submission. Also a picture of Christ and believers in our forgiveness and love. I thought it was something we had to try so hard to do, and at times we do, but a lot of the time it's simply loving and forgiving each other as Christ has done. If my human sinful husband can forgive me, how could I ever doubt that Christ could? Nothing is new to Jesus, nothing is news to Him. He knows my prayers and my tears before a word leaves my lips or a thought enters my head, and yet, He tells me to bring them to Him. Nothing in this world can replace that. No matter how intimate and close I am to my husband, he doesn't know my thoughts and deepest aches. Only Christ can fulfill that need to be known so deeply. Andy does a good job, but only when I turn to Christ can I find complete understanding for everything.
Lately I find myself thinking about those times in Scripture when Jesus was tired. I sometimes get so tired all I want is to cry and sleep. Maybe Jesus felt that way, maybe He just wanted some peace. I think about how it must have felt to feel so alone on that Cross. Because Jesus was rejected by God and suffered and died, I can always find acceptance and love in the Father. His rejection lead to my salvation and acceptance. How Great A Salvation we really can have! I have a Father in Heaven who rejoices over me personally and knows what my heart cry is. Nothing On this Earth Can Compare. And may I never try to replace it with something else.
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